[Booklet] Helping Children and Adolescents Cope with Violence and Disasters: What Parents Can Do

Practical ways parents and others can help children in the days, weeks, and months after traumatic events.
From the US National Institute on Mental Health.
Tips are practical and some are arranged by age groups.
An excerpt from the booklet 

How Parents Can Help:

After violence or a disaster parents and family should:

• Identify and address their own feelings — this will allow them to help others
• Explain to children what happened
• Let children know:
  • You love them
  • The event was not their fault
  • You will take care of them, but only if you can; be honest
  • It’s okay for them to feel upset
• DO:
  • Allow children to cry
  • Allow sadness
  • Let children talk about feelings
  • Let them write about feelings
  • Let them draw pictures
• DON’T:
  • Expect children to be brave or tough
  • Make children discuss the event before they are ready
  • Get angry if children show strong emotions
  • Get upset if they begin:
    • Bed-wetting
    • Acting out
    • Thumb-sucking
• If children have trouble sleeping:
  • Give them extra attention
  • Let them sleep with a light on
  • Let them sleep in your room (for a short time)
• Try to keep normal routines (such routines may not be normal for some children):
  • Bed-time stories
  • Eating dinner together
  • Watching TV together
  • Reading books, exercising, playing games
• If you can’t keep normal routines, make new ones together
• Help children feel in control:
  • Let them choose meals, if possible
  • Let them pick out clothes, if possible
  • Let them make some decisions for themselves, when possible.

 

Related articles

• How to talk with children about the Connecticut shooting, other tragedies (q13fox.com)
• SAMHSA Coping with Violence and Traumatic Events (samhsa.gov)
• How to Cope With Fear After School Shootings (livescience.com)
• NAEYC Tips for Talking to Young Children (drcindysimpson.com)
• Save the Children Offers 10 Tips to Help All Children Cope (5minutesformom.com)